I’m tired of fake apologies.
I’ve seen so many recently from celebrities, and I could so easily take the word recently out of that statement. But I feel like I’m getting better at recognizing them. The word “but” is often the most obvious clue, invoking the conventional wisdom that nothing that precedes the word “but” ever matters. The problem is finding all the implied buts.
Every time I hear, “I apologize to anyone who was offended,” I can hear the “but” that follows that phrase. But this is ridiculous. But you’re all overreacting. But you shouldn’t have let it bother you in the first place. The fake apology has moved the actual inciting act into the head of the viewer: our problems began when you chose to become so upset. This is part of a larger pattern of the fake apology, it’s always trying to re-write what happened.
This is why it’s different from an insincere apology where one says the minimum required words without meaning them. In my childhood I was often accused of flippantly saying “Sorry” like the problem was solved. But even an insincere apology admits something happened. The fake apology changes everything, with complete sincerity. Continue reading “Fake Apologies”
Coq au Vin 